What's Cooking?

I've written this before on my blog, and said it lots of times - I hate cooking. I do not enjoy taking the time out to buy all kinds of ingredients, assemble them for a recipe, make something, and then eat it. That just takes entirely too much time. And I've discovered I'm like my mom - after I've cooked something, I have no interest in eating it. I've looked at it for almost an hour, I know what's in it, I've smelled it getting ready, and as good as it might be, I have no appetite for it. It's so much more exciting (and so much less exhausting!) to have it arrive magically on my plate.

But I do cook. I just absolutely loathe the process. But this family will not live on take out, so cook I do, not well, not with love in my heart, but for the simple act of survival.

What I don't like about not liking to cook, however, is the vibe I get from people (women) when I tell them, honestly, that I don't like to cook. It's as if my womanhood has been ripped out of me, like my ovaries have been julienned and served au gratin (I clearly have no idea what these terms mean). Why am I SUPPOSED to LOVE slinging a wooden spoon and know exactly what one means when one says "braise" (huh?) or broil (really, what is the difference between broil and roast? Thankfully we don't eat meat)?

I was a part of a marketing focus group about vitamins and supplements, and when I mentioned that I hate cooking, a few of the women looked at me with horror. I wanted to scream back, "But I love to organize! And my house is so clean you could drop your roasted shank pork loin thing on my floor and continue to eat it! What's your house look like, huh, Julia Child? While you're all boiling and basting and sauteeing, I am revelling in the joy of a clean, organized home. I can find my taxes from 2004 in 3 minutes. A friend called and is stopping by in 30 minutes? Not a problem thanks to my rule, 'A place for everything and everything in its place.' "

One woman in particular just kept at it with the, "Well, I just love to cook. I want my family to eat healthy. I love to experiment with all different kinds of foods and herbs and we belong to a Food Co-op and I watch all the food shows..."

Why do I care? I shouldn't care. I do A LOT of things for my family. They are all functioning and alive. They wear clean clothes everyday. Bills get paid on time. I work. Monkey Man eats as balanced of a diet that a picky 6 year-old can get away with. But for some reason, I just feel like I SHOULD love to cook. But, nah. I'd so much rather clean out a closet. Now that's some good times!