Twas the Night Before Disney, when in this here house,
The preschooler was not sleeping, too excited for Mickey Mouse.
The luggage was lined up by the front door with care,
Mommy hoped that sweet slumber would waft through the air.
Monkey Man tried to sleep in his bed,
But visions of 5 a.m. danced through his head.
For the 90th time he asked, "Mommy, will you wake me to go?"
And for the 90th time, exhausted, I replied, "It is so."
When up the stairs there arose such a clatter,
I dashed to the foot of them to see what was the matter.
There Monkey Man sat on a monogrammed stool,
And declared, "I will sleep here" I replied, "No! You fool!"
"Get into that bed, I know you're excited, but please,
If you don't get some rest you'll disappoint The Big Cheese.
He's watching you (yeah, I pulled the Santa threat, so sly),
And if you don't sleep this instant kiss Mickey goodbye.
The questions fired at me, excitement built up
"Is there a couch in the hotel? Water, and a cup?
Why does Pluto walk on two legs, instead of four?
Is Ariel a Princess?" (Um, no, she's a whore)
"Is Pirates of the 'Bean scary? Or no?"
Do you like the Buzz Lightyear ride or the Indy Show?
Am I tall enough for Splash Mountain? Can I bring Snuggly, too?
Can I ride on Peter Pan with Daddy and you?"
My patience was wearing thin like sunscreen upon,
a Disney World tourist in July's summer sun
So I threw on my best Mommy Smile and cooed,
"I know you're excited!" (But, c'mon. DUDE.)
Thoughts of children's Benedryl danced through my head,
For this night ahead of me filled me with dread.
Then I looked over to see a drowsy Monkey Man sleepy,
Into sweet Disney Eve slumber, it made me quite weepy.
For I know these precious times I hold dear,
And we've been blessed to spend time like this each and every year.
The innocent excitement of a 4 year-old's brain,
So pure, so real, you just cannot feign.
I went to bed cursing the alarm (set for 3),
But, admittedly, sharing Monkey's Man's glee.
And you'll hear me exclaim as I fly out of sight,
"Pass the Xanax, I'm scared to death of air flight!"