Monkey Man had diarrhea for the first time in his life since he could actually remember. I think he had it when he was a baby, but honestly, other than his life-threatening nut and shellfish allergies, this kid stays pretty healthy. Must be his mother’s OCD and the fact that we essentially live in a Lysol can that is disguised as a house.
He had a really bad stomachache the other night that came on suddenly. He cried and I stayed with him in the bathroom. I just had this stomach thing the night before and it was still fresh in my mind how badly my stomach hurt, so I was feeling extra empathetic for the poor kid. After the first round of butt-yuck, he felt better and was a little amazed at what had just spewed out of him.
The second round he had his dad in there with him. The following was retold by my husband, since I did not have the awesome privilege of being in the bathroom to witness…
The 3 Stages of Diarrhea as told by a 7 year-old:
- “Daddy! It’s like my butt is peeing out poop!”
- “Oooh, my butt is on fire!”
- “Ouch. It hurts to wipe.”
Leave it to a 7 year-old boy to not only give a play-by-play of bodily functions, but to cut right to the chase and tell it exactly like it is.