There are 3 things one should not do on one's birthday:
1. Laundry
2. Vacuum
3. Pick up dog poop in the yard
So let me justify why I did all 3 of these things on Saturday. It's called OCD.
I could not let a basket of clean clothes sit until Sunday to be folded and put away. So I thought to myself, "I know it's my birthday, but it'll just take a few minutes." And away those clothes went.
The family room is the only carpeted room in my house. And we have a black, shedding dog. I vacuum that room about twice a day. So, really, how could I NOT do it just once? "And while the vacuum is out, I'll just get the area rug in the living room. Oh, hell, I might as well drag it upstairs and get the area rugs in the bedrooms, too."
Monkey Man and Hubby went to see "Diary of a Wimpy Kid." I went to the gym. When I got back from the gym, the dog looked at me like, "Please, please mommy, let's play! Please! I wanna play!" So guilt took over, and I played ball with him. And while I was in the yard I tried to tell myself, "I WILL NOT pick up dog poop on my birthday." But seriously, I'm me. And I cannot ignore dog crap in my backyard.
Monday, March 28, 2011
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Three Wishes
For my birthday, which is today, the day I've been dreading a little bit because I've officially moved out of the "mid-thirties" and am now in my GASP. CHOKE. LATE THIRTIES. FAINT.
Monkey Man asked me the other day what I would like for my birthday. I told him I would like 3 things, none of which cost any money at all.
1. A hug and kiss
2. To sleep in
3. A homemade card (this is a tradition in my family for all holidays)
Monkey Man greeted me this morning at about 8:30 with a hug and a kiss. He told me I could sleep until 9:05. Then he presented his card to me:
In just 6 short years of knowing his mother, he has me pegged. Love this kid.
Monkey Man asked me the other day what I would like for my birthday. I told him I would like 3 things, none of which cost any money at all.
1. A hug and kiss
2. To sleep in
3. A homemade card (this is a tradition in my family for all holidays)
Monkey Man greeted me this morning at about 8:30 with a hug and a kiss. He told me I could sleep until 9:05. Then he presented his card to me:
In just 6 short years of knowing his mother, he has me pegged. Love this kid.
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Happy Birthday! Love, the DMV
I had to renew my license by the end of this month, so why not wait until the end of the month? That's when DMV is the busiest, and I absolutely love to stand on long lines and listen to the DMV employess bark at people who just need to know WHICH line to stand on because there are like 34 lines.
While standing on line, I remembered 4 years ago when I last renewed my license and thinking, "The next time I do this, I'll be 37 years-old. Holy Crap." Well, welcome to Holy Crap. In 2 days, I'll be 37. HOW? How did this happen?
And then my next thought came. Almost 20 years ago to the day, I just took my driver's test and got my license for the first time. I even remember what I was wearing on the day that sweet freedom came in the shape of a glossy rectangle. A black windbreaker, jeans that were tightly cuffed around my ankle, and brand-spanking new birthday Nikes was my outfit of choice upon turning 17.
Which brings me to thinking about all of the things that have happened in 20 years. Those years seem to have passed in a flash, with these memories playing back like scenes from a movie. And now, my lucky readers, I give you a bunch of stuff that happened to me in the last 20 years. Feel free to either use this as material to help you drift into slumber or get yourself thinking about YOUR last 20 years...
Starting at age 17:
My niece was born
Received my driver's license
Went to Cancun with my friend and her family
Got my first car (can someone say 1986 Dodge Lancer? Holla!)
Graduated high school
Started college
Got dumped by my high school boyfriend
Joined a sorority
Got myself another boyfriend
My nephew was born
Experienced my one and only college spring break in the Bahamas
Graduated college
Visited Aruba
Bought my first BRAND NEW car (1996 Chevy Cavalier - Oh Yeah!)
Got my first real job
Visited London and Ireland
Broke up with boyfriend
Dated co-worker, who turned into Hubby :)
Got engaged in Disneyland
Got married
Went on several Disney cruises and visited Disney World every year
Bought our first house
Got our dog, Walt
Went back to school for my teaching degree
Became a teacher
Went on a cross-country road trip for my 30th birthday
Found out the best little boy in the world was coming into our lives!
Gave birth to Monkey Man
Survived the newborn stage (how, I'll never know!)
Worked from home with hubby
Sold our first house, bought our current house
Met Rick Springfield!
Returned to teaching part-time
Which brings us here, 20 years later. I might be 37 (in 2 days) on paper, but in my heart and mind, I'm still 17. And that's what counts.
While standing on line, I remembered 4 years ago when I last renewed my license and thinking, "The next time I do this, I'll be 37 years-old. Holy Crap." Well, welcome to Holy Crap. In 2 days, I'll be 37. HOW? How did this happen?
And then my next thought came. Almost 20 years ago to the day, I just took my driver's test and got my license for the first time. I even remember what I was wearing on the day that sweet freedom came in the shape of a glossy rectangle. A black windbreaker, jeans that were tightly cuffed around my ankle, and brand-spanking new birthday Nikes was my outfit of choice upon turning 17.
Which brings me to thinking about all of the things that have happened in 20 years. Those years seem to have passed in a flash, with these memories playing back like scenes from a movie. And now, my lucky readers, I give you a bunch of stuff that happened to me in the last 20 years. Feel free to either use this as material to help you drift into slumber or get yourself thinking about YOUR last 20 years...
Starting at age 17:
My niece was born
Received my driver's license
Went to Cancun with my friend and her family
Got my first car (can someone say 1986 Dodge Lancer? Holla!)
Graduated high school
Started college
Got dumped by my high school boyfriend
Joined a sorority
Got myself another boyfriend
My nephew was born
Experienced my one and only college spring break in the Bahamas
Graduated college
Visited Aruba
Bought my first BRAND NEW car (1996 Chevy Cavalier - Oh Yeah!)
Got my first real job
Visited London and Ireland
Broke up with boyfriend
Dated co-worker, who turned into Hubby :)
Got engaged in Disneyland
Got married
Went on several Disney cruises and visited Disney World every year
Bought our first house
Got our dog, Walt
Went back to school for my teaching degree
Became a teacher
Went on a cross-country road trip for my 30th birthday
Found out the best little boy in the world was coming into our lives!
Gave birth to Monkey Man
Survived the newborn stage (how, I'll never know!)
Worked from home with hubby
Sold our first house, bought our current house
Met Rick Springfield!
Returned to teaching part-time
Which brings us here, 20 years later. I might be 37 (in 2 days) on paper, but in my heart and mind, I'm still 17. And that's what counts.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
This Could Get Ugly
We have a snow day today. It is March 23. I know people sent Mother Nature some memos about this ri-freakin-diculous weather we've had all winter, but it is officially spring. And I saw my grass last week. And I ran in a tank top on Friday. So can we please stop the nice-nice with Mama Earth and just give her a swift kick in the ass?
Not only is she pissing me off with this weather, but now I am stuck in the house today for my snow day. I love a day off from work hanging with Monkey Man, but let's remember I am trying hard not to eat sugar. So what's my plan for the day? To bake about 4 dozen chocolate chip cookies for Monkey Man's school Tricky Tray this weekend. Gotta make good use of this time off.
I just hope Hubby doesn't come home from work later to find me in a sugar coma.
Not only is she pissing me off with this weather, but now I am stuck in the house today for my snow day. I love a day off from work hanging with Monkey Man, but let's remember I am trying hard not to eat sugar. So what's my plan for the day? To bake about 4 dozen chocolate chip cookies for Monkey Man's school Tricky Tray this weekend. Gotta make good use of this time off.
I just hope Hubby doesn't come home from work later to find me in a sugar coma.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Three Cheers for Fiber One!
Although Fiber One bars do help me keep my chocolate sanity, I have to put out this PSA - TWO Fiber One bars in one day might not make for a comfortable night. But, hey, it's worth it - I didn't touch those mini Oreos that have been snickering at me all day in my pantry.
So Day 1, Take 3 was successful. That friggin' Easter Bunny better get here soon.
So Day 1, Take 3 was successful. That friggin' Easter Bunny better get here soon.
This Could Have Been Easier
Here is a list of specific foods containing sugar that should have gotten the boot during this brilliant 40-day fast I can't stick to. The reason? I hate these foods:
Jelly donuts - Purple goo shooting out of a non-chocolate donut? Eww.
Cherry pie - Red, gelatinous material disguised in a yummy crust. No thank you.
Lemon Merangue Pie - The lemon is like a sponge. Clearly, I have food texture issues.
Whoppers candy - Malt is gross.
Danishes - All of them. Even if they have chocolate on or in them. Yuck.
Chocolate Eclairs - I know, this sounds strange because aren't they like the King of Italian Desserts? The cream filling is way too sweet for even my taste buds. And I do love me some sweet!
Anything with coconut on or in it. Again with the food consistency - I don't like those coconut flakes.
I'll think of more. And I'll put that in a different post because I'm totally kicking ass on the blog post quota I set for myself!
Jelly donuts - Purple goo shooting out of a non-chocolate donut? Eww.
Cherry pie - Red, gelatinous material disguised in a yummy crust. No thank you.
Lemon Merangue Pie - The lemon is like a sponge. Clearly, I have food texture issues.
Whoppers candy - Malt is gross.
Danishes - All of them. Even if they have chocolate on or in them. Yuck.
Chocolate Eclairs - I know, this sounds strange because aren't they like the King of Italian Desserts? The cream filling is way too sweet for even my taste buds. And I do love me some sweet!
Anything with coconut on or in it. Again with the food consistency - I don't like those coconut flakes.
I'll think of more. And I'll put that in a different post because I'm totally kicking ass on the blog post quota I set for myself!
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Oh My GANACHE!
Hubby and I have been having a much-needed heaping of good luck these past few weeks. Lots of good news right in the middle of my sugar strike. Good news should be celebrated with chocolate and cake and more chocolate and cookies! Sorry health magazines, but I am not celebrating with a brisk walk around the neighborhood.
Round of Luck #1: Hubby was was chosen as one of the nominees in the Best Newspaper Comic Panel of 2010 Division for the 65th Annual Reuben Awards. Each year, the National Cartoonists Society honors the year’s outstanding achievements in all walks of the profession including newspaper strips, newspaper panels, TV animation, feature animation, newspaper illustration, gag cartoons, book illustration, greeting cards, comic books, magazine feature/magazine illustration, and editorial cartoons. This is H.U.G. to the E.
Round of Luck #2: In my tireless search for a full-time teaching position, I was hired for a maternity leave. It's not permanent, but could open doors to something. I start in May and could not be happier!
Round of Luck #3: We went to our accountant and let's just say if Uncle Sam really did exist, I would totally give him a lap dance.
So, in celebration of the last two weeks, hubby and I went to a fabulous restaurant last night. It's an old mansion and the decor is all Americana antique. We ate our dinner, and when dessert time rolled around, hubby ordered a mini chocolate ganache cake topped with mint chocolate chip ice cream. I ordered tea, I swear to you. The waiter, like a crack dealer taunting a junkie, said, "Let me bring one out for you,too." I giggled, said, "No, that's okay." And the bastard said, "No, really, I'll bring one out for you." I started scratching at my face, beads of sweat beginning to form on my forehead, and I said, "Okay."
Famous freakin' last words.
This is what my warm Ganache cake with fudge filling, topped with chocolate chip-mint ice cream looked like before it suffered it's death.
Round of Luck #1: Hubby was was chosen as one of the nominees in the Best Newspaper Comic Panel of 2010 Division for the 65th Annual Reuben Awards. Each year, the National Cartoonists Society honors the year’s outstanding achievements in all walks of the profession including newspaper strips, newspaper panels, TV animation, feature animation, newspaper illustration, gag cartoons, book illustration, greeting cards, comic books, magazine feature/magazine illustration, and editorial cartoons. This is H.U.G. to the E.
Round of Luck #2: In my tireless search for a full-time teaching position, I was hired for a maternity leave. It's not permanent, but could open doors to something. I start in May and could not be happier!
Round of Luck #3: We went to our accountant and let's just say if Uncle Sam really did exist, I would totally give him a lap dance.
So, in celebration of the last two weeks, hubby and I went to a fabulous restaurant last night. It's an old mansion and the decor is all Americana antique. We ate our dinner, and when dessert time rolled around, hubby ordered a mini chocolate ganache cake topped with mint chocolate chip ice cream. I ordered tea, I swear to you. The waiter, like a crack dealer taunting a junkie, said, "Let me bring one out for you,too." I giggled, said, "No, that's okay." And the bastard said, "No, really, I'll bring one out for you." I started scratching at my face, beads of sweat beginning to form on my forehead, and I said, "Okay."
Famous freakin' last words.
This is what my warm Ganache cake with fudge filling, topped with chocolate chip-mint ice cream looked like before it suffered it's death.
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