Friday, March 7, 2008

One Child Left Behind

Did you know that the “No Child Left Behind Act” does not apply to YMCA swimming classes? This classic act assures that 8th graders who read at a 2nd grade level continue on to high school but it couldn’t come to the rescue of Monkey Man. Yes, folks, at the tender age of 3 (in just 4 days), he has been left behind in his swimming class because he won’t let go of me. Not because he can’t read. Not because he can’t add, say the word “nuclear” correctly, or figure out what n means in an equation. Because he won’t let go. Good to know thousands of kids across America will enter the real world one day with no life skills because of our country’s leader. But Monkey Man, with all his time in remedial swimming, well damn, he’ll be the best bubble-wearing, doggy paddler you ever did see!


Anonymous said...

So, what you are saying is that he is already over qualified to run the country?

youarekiddingme said...

Yes, and he'll be an Olympic gold medalist swimmer with all his years of practice!